Circuit Court New Orleans
Crazy Johnnie's
Steak House
3520 18th Street
Metairie, LA
Map
This Restaurant
2/03
Yep,
it's official, Johnnie is definitely crazy. That's a good thing, 'cause
if Johnnie ever gets hold of her senses the prices on her steaks are
going to go up about five bucks.
The
price to taste ratio is indeed in your favor. $11.95 for a nice thick
filet, a humongous pile of chunky, buttery, skins-on mashed potatoes,
and some weird, fake looking slice of tomotoe (bonus "e" for
you Dan Quayle groupies). I should say a word about the steak first,
and that word is Holy crap! What a steak! It's firm yet juicy. It's
chewy but still meltingly tender. Why, it's beefy-riffic! It's a supernova
of meaty flavor, doing the hippy-hippy shake all over your taste buds.
Seriously, silly metaphors don't do this steak justice. You gotta experience
it, man. It's said to be "Prime" beef, but I don't have a
clue as to what those beef grading scales mean. All I know is what
my mouth
tells me, and my mouth tells me, in a sonorous and soothing voice,
that it's good meat! They also slice up pieces of filet for a sandwich
at
lunch for something like six bucks, an outrageous steal of a price
for stuff this yummy.
Also
for the tasting but not quite as good is the "Dipping Bread":
plain old French bread served with a bowlful of spicy brown butter
sauce that tastes suspiciously like the barbecued shrimp sauce. Hey
wait! It
IS the barbecued shrimp sauce! Not terrible, but sort of spartan
for a dish by itself. A better option is the Crawfish Johnnie appetizer
for $4.95, a big ladle of creamy crawfish sauce over croutons, spicy
and
rich.
A couple
things you need to know. First, you must buy a drink. Not necessarily
the adult kind, but some sort of beverage, and the
refills
ain't free.
It's how they can keep their prices so low and still stay in business.
Second, there's the smoke. The cigarette smoke is oppressively
thick, and for me it's a problem. I just don't like secondhand smoke,
especially
while I'm eating. Don't get the impression that I'm one of these
anti-smoking nut jobs -- quite the contrary. Smoke 'em if you got
'em, I say. I'll
just eat somewhere else if it gets unbearable. But the meat is
worth it. I also like the fact that they don't pretend to have a non-smoking
section. The place is small, and the smoke is going to go everywhere
anyway. But oh, the meat. There's a large L-shaped bar wrapped
around
one side of the place where smokers gleefully indulge their nasty
habit. But dear god, the meat!
So check
it out for yourself. Bring an oxygen mask if you'd like. Johnnie won't
mind -- she's crazy!
Contact
Magistrate Loupe at magistrate@neworleans.com
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